While the media tells us one thing, I think a good number of married women can attest that the media portrays an extremely unrealistic standard of what makes a woman beautiful.
After reading The Spy Wore Red by Aline Countess of Romanones(a memoir of a young model turned spy during WWII), I googled images of Aline (I google information about people I read about and the places they lived). In the book, Aline is wined and dined and described as being beautiful and fashionable. The image in my head of beautiful? Tall and skinny with delicate features. The images of the Countess on google? Statuesque and robust.
This doesn't mean that Aline is not beautiful. She just lived in a different time--a time long gone before I was influenced to the extent I have been by the media. That was a time when women like Janis Paige and Jayne Mansfield were sex icons. These women are no way "delicate" or "skinny". A glimpse at their bodies do not conjure thoughts of twigs snapping in two. These women have not only average sized breasts but they also have rounded hips and meat on their bones. Simply put, these woman have womanly figures.
When I complain to my husband that I gained 10 pounds last year and that I feel fat, he tries to reassure me that I look good. Until recently I didn't really believe him. He is sweet and always knows the right thing to say. It's not that he is insincere; he is merely gifted, not superficial, and he loves me.
Lately I've noticed young woman who are twigs and I think,"Ugh! How can anyone find that attractive?" It's not jealousy, because I have experienced jealousy in the past. No, this is something more. This is having my eyes opened and recognizing that beauty does not come in a size 4 or under. It does not mean that you can see my ribs or I have hardly any fat. It means that I am healthy, fit, and my metabolism has slowed down with age.
Men are physical beings. Maybe their brain's aren't their default thought processors, but I'm learning that they are attracted to women who are average, healthy sizes. (And big boobs don't really matter, so long as the women they love have some.) And a man can lust after a woman because he likes her body, but he'll love a woman he can relate to, laugh with, and have a physical relationship with (at the right time of course!).
To think of all the energy I wasted fretting over weight and size for the past 15-18 years! It didn't make me happy or carefree; it was frustrating and confining.
My new mission in life is to teach this bit o'wisdom to the young women, teenagers, and now elementary aged girls (because, unfortunately, more and more of this age group are becoming concerned with their looks) who are caught up in false notions of beauty.
Be healthy and enjoy life!
After reading The Spy Wore Red by Aline Countess of Romanones(a memoir of a young model turned spy during WWII), I googled images of Aline (I google information about people I read about and the places they lived). In the book, Aline is wined and dined and described as being beautiful and fashionable. The image in my head of beautiful? Tall and skinny with delicate features. The images of the Countess on google? Statuesque and robust.
This doesn't mean that Aline is not beautiful. She just lived in a different time--a time long gone before I was influenced to the extent I have been by the media. That was a time when women like Janis Paige and Jayne Mansfield were sex icons. These women are no way "delicate" or "skinny". A glimpse at their bodies do not conjure thoughts of twigs snapping in two. These women have not only average sized breasts but they also have rounded hips and meat on their bones. Simply put, these woman have womanly figures.
When I complain to my husband that I gained 10 pounds last year and that I feel fat, he tries to reassure me that I look good. Until recently I didn't really believe him. He is sweet and always knows the right thing to say. It's not that he is insincere; he is merely gifted, not superficial, and he loves me.
Lately I've noticed young woman who are twigs and I think,"Ugh! How can anyone find that attractive?" It's not jealousy, because I have experienced jealousy in the past. No, this is something more. This is having my eyes opened and recognizing that beauty does not come in a size 4 or under. It does not mean that you can see my ribs or I have hardly any fat. It means that I am healthy, fit, and my metabolism has slowed down with age.
Men are physical beings. Maybe their brain's aren't their default thought processors, but I'm learning that they are attracted to women who are average, healthy sizes. (And big boobs don't really matter, so long as the women they love have some.) And a man can lust after a woman because he likes her body, but he'll love a woman he can relate to, laugh with, and have a physical relationship with (at the right time of course!).
To think of all the energy I wasted fretting over weight and size for the past 15-18 years! It didn't make me happy or carefree; it was frustrating and confining.
My new mission in life is to teach this bit o'wisdom to the young women, teenagers, and now elementary aged girls (because, unfortunately, more and more of this age group are becoming concerned with their looks) who are caught up in false notions of beauty.
Be healthy and enjoy life!
