Anyone who believes the primary purpose of a woman is to be wed and to bear children or that she is defined by her husband contributes to the oppression of women, making her a second class citizen in their society. Think of all the heartache and depression that women who lack the opportunity to learn a profitable skill, to think and voice her own opinions, and to live independently suffer from.
Ideally, all women should learn to live independently. She should learn a skill so she can find employment if she so desires and/or when it becomes necessary for her to maintain her and her family's quality of life. She should learn money management skills. She should experience life and develop "street smarts" so she can navigate her society on her own. A woman must be confident that she can make a meaningful contribution to her society; that when problems arise she a) already possesses the skills, b)she is confident she can gain the skills; c) believes she can at least fake the skills to survive; and d) that she is resourceful enough to find an adequate support group and aid.
Perhaps the greatest triumph of the women's lib movement in the United States (and one that hopefully we don't take for granted) is that a woman was no longer limited to developing merely her domestic talents (including sacrificing herself for the sake of her children or piggish husband). Her options slowly but surely expanded to encompass a variety of educational opportunities. No longer is she limited to the reputable so-called "female" occupations of teaching, nursing, or secretarial duties. Now many women are doctors, lawyers, soldiers, CEOs, hold government office, have graduate degrees, and so on and so forth. Now women are recognized for their accomplishments outside of marriage and family life, nor is she expected to live through her husband and children. A woman can choose to be a stay at home mom, to remain single and pursue a career, or do both.
Yes, sacrifices are always made in relationships and probably moreso in a marriage and with children. However, a woman is no longer earning room and board by keeping house and cooking for her husband who works 8 hours a day and then comes home, puts his feet up, and expects to be doted until bedtime. A wife and mother has traditionally worked 12 hours a day and been on call the other half of the day.
This anger comes after watching yet another show about how women in third world countries are treated (chattel to their fathers and then to their husbands) and comparing these experiences with those of what I observe here in the States. Women in different regions of the U.S. seem to value different lifestyles, some of which are just a few steps away from what women in third world countries suffer--a truly sad phenomenon when American women have so many paths to choose from.
All women should recognize that they have a voice. They should expect respect and an equal partnership in their marriages and other romantic relationships. They should be able to respect their husbands, not just because of their husbands' occupations but for how their husbands act when in the privacy of their own homes. Husbands should be expected to take on the role of father, meaning they too are "on call" as soon they get home (when does a woman have time to make up the sleep she loses when staying up with the kids?) and carry their fair share of domestic chores (and fair is relative to the family).
Ideally, all women should learn to live independently. She should learn a skill so she can find employment if she so desires and/or when it becomes necessary for her to maintain her and her family's quality of life. She should learn money management skills. She should experience life and develop "street smarts" so she can navigate her society on her own. A woman must be confident that she can make a meaningful contribution to her society; that when problems arise she a) already possesses the skills, b)she is confident she can gain the skills; c) believes she can at least fake the skills to survive; and d) that she is resourceful enough to find an adequate support group and aid.
Perhaps the greatest triumph of the women's lib movement in the United States (and one that hopefully we don't take for granted) is that a woman was no longer limited to developing merely her domestic talents (including sacrificing herself for the sake of her children or piggish husband). Her options slowly but surely expanded to encompass a variety of educational opportunities. No longer is she limited to the reputable so-called "female" occupations of teaching, nursing, or secretarial duties. Now many women are doctors, lawyers, soldiers, CEOs, hold government office, have graduate degrees, and so on and so forth. Now women are recognized for their accomplishments outside of marriage and family life, nor is she expected to live through her husband and children. A woman can choose to be a stay at home mom, to remain single and pursue a career, or do both.
Yes, sacrifices are always made in relationships and probably moreso in a marriage and with children. However, a woman is no longer earning room and board by keeping house and cooking for her husband who works 8 hours a day and then comes home, puts his feet up, and expects to be doted until bedtime. A wife and mother has traditionally worked 12 hours a day and been on call the other half of the day.
This anger comes after watching yet another show about how women in third world countries are treated (chattel to their fathers and then to their husbands) and comparing these experiences with those of what I observe here in the States. Women in different regions of the U.S. seem to value different lifestyles, some of which are just a few steps away from what women in third world countries suffer--a truly sad phenomenon when American women have so many paths to choose from.
All women should recognize that they have a voice. They should expect respect and an equal partnership in their marriages and other romantic relationships. They should be able to respect their husbands, not just because of their husbands' occupations but for how their husbands act when in the privacy of their own homes. Husbands should be expected to take on the role of father, meaning they too are "on call" as soon they get home (when does a woman have time to make up the sleep she loses when staying up with the kids?) and carry their fair share of domestic chores (and fair is relative to the family).
1 comments:
Anonymous said...
Totally wanted to burn my bra just then. :-D
I completely agree.
I am too often defined by what I lack in my family and not what I have accomplished.